Baby Love

Timing couldn't have been more perfect.

Just about the time that Jackie started to take notice of her baby doll, hugging her, kissing slobbering all over her plastic face, and taking her little plastic hands to play "Patty Cake" was when we found out baby number 2 would be coming sometime in early November.  It was almost as if she had a sixth sense.

It wasn't just the dolly either.  Somehow around mid-April Jackie suddenly became OBSESSED with my belly.  Lifting my shirt up touching it softly (not pinching like she does everywhere else...), and even laying her head down and cuddling up with my tummy. 

Weird.

She was only barely a year old.  She doesn't understand yet. 

Does she???

And then she noticed other babies.  Wanting to hug them and kiss slobber on them, just like her dolly.  She's always been social and liked being around other kids, but this was different. 

It's funny how God works.  How He prepares us for the unknown and unexpected.  Well, not totally unexpected. We always talked about having a kids close together.  19 months close for the first two.  :)

I know that introducing a new born baby to it's older sibling can be a challenge. I know there can be lots of jealousy and almost hatred toward the new arrival honing in on already claimed territory.  I'm sure there will be a transition period, but I am hopeful that time will be short. 

Jackie has already demonstrated love.  Even before we officially knew there was something to love, she was ready. 

And in the mean time we will continue to encourage the hugs and kisses and love that she shows to her dolly, other babies, and my tummy.  Because she may not technically understand how her world is going to change, but she does understand love.

And that is all she needs to know.

"Oh good...it's summer, you will blog again!"

"Now I will have something to read"

The previous quotes were said to me this weekend by my husband. 

Flattered that I am, that he likes to read what I write, I was a little taken-aback.

I blog during the school year...

Kind of.

Ok.  There is a bit of a difference between the blog count over last summer and this last school year.  However, I will argue, that there is a hidden factor that makes a bigger difference than whether or not I'm spending 8 hours a day with teenagers. 

A keyboard.

You see, we recently "traded in" our home laptop for a new tablet.  I have had an iPad for a while now, and Ethan wanted to try out the Dell tablet.  We, did not, however go for the keyboard attachment.  (Mistake...we will be getting one eventually.)

Blogging and a keyboard go hand in hand for me.  I know I may not be technologically "with it,"  but I just can't chicken peck or text-type an entire blog. 

"But Jill, what about your laptop at school???  It has a keyboard."

Yes, it does.  However, I do have a problem with doing a person blog while on school time.  I always flash back to The Office episode where Jim times Dwight every time he is "off-task" and therefore stealing time from the company.  Plus...I have enough to do while I'm there to blog about my home life.

So, yes.  There has been quite a space since the last blog post, and I'm sure there will be more frequent views into our lives as the summer progresses. 

The Berlin Wall

No, I am not talking about the wall that divided East and West Germany for decades.

I'm talking about a pillow.

Sleeping habits of a person are as unique as the individual.  Some people sleep only on their sides, stomach, or back.  Some snore (thankfully neither one of us does that on a regular basis), some sleep walk, some are heavy sleepers, while others will wake at the sound of the furnace kicking on at night. Some need a completely dark room, some like a TV or radio to be on while they sleep.  Some need huge fluffy pillows, others a flat almost non-existing pillow.

Ethan and I have our sides of the bed, his closest to the TV and mine closest to the path to the bathroom.  We are both relatively light sleepers (until the morning, and then for some reason not much will wake Ethan up. Hmmmm...).  The TV stays on while we fall asleep and then shuts off by automatic timer.  We both roll around throughout the night.

The point of my story comes in two parts of our sleeping habits.  At any given point we could be on our backs, sides, or stomachs.  I'm pretty sure we hit all areas at some point in the night.  And pillows.  I am a flat pillow sleeper, and Ethan likes a little more plush to his head rest.  Always at some point before falling asleep, I make myself a little "pillow sandwich" surrounding myself on both sides with a pillow.  One of those ends up between Ethan and me.  He has dubbed that "the Berlin Wall."  A wall which we complains keeps him from cuddling up with me in the middle of the night.

It's not my fault!  It's all Jackie's fault!

I didn't used to need the pillow sandwich.

You see, when I hit the half-way mark with my pregnancy I was no longer able to sleep on my back.  Which I didn't think was that big of deal.  Until I would find myself awake in the morning on my back.  I rolled in the middle of the night and would end up with very sore and achy in the morning.  So I needed help from rolling directly on to my back.  I found that if I put pillows on both sides of me, it would keep me from rolling.  Plus it was comfortable!

Too comfortable.

Because now, with no baby in my belly and no reason to keep from rolling on my back I still need the sandwich.  I can't get comfortable without it, and with years to come of having more babies and actually needing the sandwich I don't see that habit changing anytime soon.

I guess until then the "Berlin Wall" will have to stay up, and the East and West sides of our bed will remain divided.  I guess we'll just have to wait a few years before we can "tear down that wall."

:-)

Around the House

I has been a cold winter filled with many different "yucky bugs" floating around wherever people gather.  Because of this, we have been spending quite a bit of time just hanging around the house.  Here's what we've been up to.

~  We rang in the New Year just as new parents should.  Put baby to bed, watched a movie, and were asleep by 10:30.  I did wake up at Midnight to pray the fireworks wouldn't wake up the baby... then rolled over and slept some more. 

~  The second semester of school is off to a great start for me.  Fun new projects, activities, and lessons for the students.  This does make it very hard to ever think about leaving it to stay home with kids.  Although, even in the middle of some awesome couple of weeks of school I find myself dreaming and thinking of what I could be doing with Jackie. 

~  Jackie took her first steps!!!  I guess we have to count them as her first steps, even though I didn't see it. :-)  Ethan was playing with her in the basement in her little play pen.  Apparently she was at one corner of the pen and let go and walked to the other corner across from her.  A couple things I have learned about our first born is that she is one determined little child.  (It's funny how you can pick up on little personality traits so young...)  If she wants to do something she will do it.  She has the balance, she has the know-how, she just doesn't have the want yet.  So as soon as she figures out that she can get from drawer #1 full of stuff she shouldn't get into, to drawer #2 full of stuff she shouldn't get into FASTER.  We're in trouble. 

~  We still need to baby proof.  I guess we better get on that!

~  I have officially been baptised into the Mommy World.  (If we had a boy, it probably would have been much earlier and a different body fluid...)  Jackie awoke one night around 11:00, which is rare, so when she wakes up there is usually a reason.  Ethan went and grabbed her, tried to rock her back to sleep, but decided to bring her to bed with us.  He handed her off to me and went somewhere to get something.  I placed her on my chest and we snuggled. She rolled over on to her back, sort of in the crook of my arm.  And without even the slightest warning, and before I knew it we were both covered in gross, nasty, disgusting baby puke (which is just like adult puke) and Ethan was rushing back into the bedroom to be passed a crying baby covered in throw-up.  I just stood there.  Dripping.  Yuck.  Bath for her, shower for me.  We did get her back to sleep in her own bed by 1:00. 

~  I am NOT eating any more of that leftover potato soup. 

~  I still haven't figured out why she threw up.  She's had two instances of puking in 2013 and both times she never acted sick!  Never whined or cried or continued throwing up.  Just played with her toys, took naps and ate crackers followed by juice.  My students think she is practicing faking sick to stay home from school.  Hmmm...could she be that crafty?

~  I am on a housekeeping/laundry roll!  I have finally figured out a system that keeps me from having to clean clean clean on the weekends, which always included at least 6 loads of laundry to fold.  (Thanks to a friend for sharing her method!)  First of all.  I'm an early bird.  I try to get up at 5:00 AM, sometimes it's more like 5:30...  I put a load of laundry in the washer in the morning.  When I get home from work I put it in the dryer and another load in the washer.  In the AM (dark and early!) I fold the load coming out of the dryer, move the wet to the dryer and put another load it.  I just continue that pattern.  It has been fantastic.  I'm folding and putting away one load (may two if I'm feeling productive) a day...and I've even had a couple days where I don't have ANY to do!  (I know that will change as our family grows).  I have been making an extra effort to keep the house picked up and kitchen clean.  It has been working!

Christmas Candy

I had grand plans this year.

Last year, we moved right before Christmas.  Putting up decorations consisted of a single nativity snow globe that was given as a gift.  Needless to say, making Christmas candy didn't happen. 

This year, I was going to do it.

I made my list of candies I wanted to make

-  Peanut Clusters (with Heath toffee bits throw in...the ONLY way to make peanut clusters)
-  Peanut butter balls
-  Rolo Pretzel Pecan bites
-  Hershey Kiss Pretzel Peanut M&M bites (the alternative to Rolo Pretzel Pecan bites...hubby's not a fan of Pecans or Rolos)

I bought the supplies.

I got right down to it once I was home and baby was down for a nap, I whipped out those peanut clusters with heath bits.  Soooo good!  I really should make those more often than just Christmas time.

And that's where it stopped. 

We got busy and when I wasn't busy I didn't feel like messing up my kitchen.

And when I got a sweet tooth (which unfortunately happens more often than my figure needs it to) I had quite a stash of Rolos, Hershey Kiss, and Peanut M&Ms. 

The pretzels and pecans are unopened.

Maybe I'll save them for next year. 

The Hits and Misses of our Christmas Break

Here are some of the highlights (and low-lights) of Christmas 2012!

Hit:  Jackie meeting Santa Claus!  What a good little baby we have.  Of course Ethan and I already know this :).  She has always been really good around new people, but lately been hitting the "stranger danger" phase.  As long as mommy or daddy is close by, Jackie warms up to the new faces pretty quickly.  Lucky for Santa, daddy and I weren't far away (or out of sight). 

Miss:  Due to some recent misfortune we were without a camera for the Christmas Season.  Thankfully we have some great friends who came in to capture many "firsts" for Jackie.  Thank you to Kim and Peggy for helping us out!

Hit:  Christmas decorations and lights!  Technically this is our second Christmas in this house, but since we closed on the sale of the house on Christmas Eve last year, this is the first year we get to decorate for the season.  Ethan braved the heights and put some very pretty lights on our house.  It didn't scare him off though, he's talking about doing more next year :).  I had fun placing the festivities around the inside of the house, with some trial and error.  I predict next year I'll have all the placement figured out and everything will be fabulous!

Miss:  Our tree was too wide for the place we wanted it to go.  Not putting it up for two years, I forgot just how big it was.  The location we wanted was a neat little corner of the family room.  However, the entire tree would have blocked the walk-way and stuck out WAY too far.  So I only put up the front half of the branches.  Yes...it did look dorky.  I didn't even end up putting any ornaments on it.  Just lights.  Next year we will purchase a pre-lit tall skinny tree and put the big one downstairs. 

Hit:  As much as I whined and moaned about having to have an in-service day the Friday before Christmas break, it ended up being a blessing in disguise.  I left my desk and classroom all straightened up and ready to go for the new semester.  Now, on our workday before kids come back I can focus on finalizing grades and planning for January.  It feels so good to know I get to go back to work to a clean classroom.

Miss:  I did not apply that same effort to my house.  I got home from our in-service on Friday (knowing full well that we were leaving for B-town before 8AM Saturday morning) and wrestled with a battle within.  The "what I don't want to do" vs. the "what I REALLY don't want to do."  I didn't want to come home from my parents to a messy house, but I REALLY didn't feel like doing any cleaning up.  Guess which side won??  If you said the "REALLY" you would be correct.  Of course if I would have even THOUGHT ahead for a MOMENT I would have remembered that we would be getting back to the house with a few hours to spare before heading to Christmas Eve Dinner at Ethan's parents' house, and I needed to make TWO breakfast casseroles that night after dinner, and a dessert before Christmas dinner on Sunday.  Needless to say my kitchen was a DISASTER area for a couple of days.  Lesson learned.  Next time power through and clean up BEFORE leaving!

Hit:  We were able to take a family Christmas photo in front of our half-tree with white lights.

Miss:  The picture is in need of some cropping because "someone" didn't have her fly zipped up.  Jackie was in a dress...  (I believe that would be what my students would call, a picture fail!)

Hit:  Jackie had SO MUCH FUN these last few days playing with grandparents, reading (or turning the pages) of her new books, and wearing her stylish new clothes. 

Miss:  Naps were is short supply for a couple of days.  There was just too much going on to sleep.  I think she is making up for it today.  Slept for 12 hours last night, took a 3 1/2 hour morning nap, and is currently working on nap #2. 

Hit: We will be meeting up with my side of the family in a couple of days to celebrate my grandparents' 60th WEDDING ANNIVERSARY!  Ethan and I are so lucky to be surrounded by so many wonderful examples of marriage and a lifetime of love.

Miss:  The break is going way too fast...can we get another week??? 

Good vs. Great

What is the difference?

What makes something GREAT as opposed to just good, and when you compare something, just how much better is great than good?

I recently came across my portfolio that I created to take along to interviews for teaching jobs.  My resume, my teaching philosophy, and my goals.

I stopped at my goals and just looked at it.

"To be Kansas Teacher of the Year."

I was serious.  I remember as if it was yesterday writing that down.  I remember that feeling of wanting to be like so many of the great teachers I had while in school.  Inspiring learning and motivating students to be their best.  Pouring my heart and soul into something that was so worthwhile.

So where am I today on the road to achieving my goal?

I believe I took a different turn.  Not a bad turn, not a less passionate turn, just a different one.

You see.  When I go back and think about all the teachers who I would classify as "great" and in the category of "Teacher of the Year" they all had one of two things in common.

They were either single, or sacrificed time with family to become great.

And there's the difference between good and great.  Great involves many sacrifices in order to get there.  No matter what you're doing.  Sports, work or family.  To be "great" at something means sacrificing other things.

I still have a passion for teaching.  I love it.  I sill believe in inspiring students and making a classroom that promotes motivation, but I'm not great.  I'm not willing to sacrifice time with my family to be a great teacher.

It goes the other way too.  Everywhere I look, I see "great" moms out there.  Making cute little crafts with their kids, sewing buttons back on, playing new games, teaching their babies sign language, basically creating all those pins on pinterest that make me feel like I'm not cutting it as a mommy.  All while never having a dirty dish in the sink, load of laundry unfolded, or surface dusty.

Most of those moms are stay at home moms.  They can devote their entire lives to being the best mom there is.

Again, that's not me.  While yes, someday, I do hope to have to opportunity to stay home with my kids at least part of the time, I'm not there yet.  I enjoy going to work.  Jackie loves going to daycare and playing with the other kids.  We're good.

I can be a good teacher and a good mom.

And I feel great about that!