A boy. I don't know what to do with a boy. Some say they're easier, some say "watch out," but I do know that I was already excited for another baby and predicting a girl. But when we found out baby #3 was to be a boy I was filled with such excitement that I didn't know was possible!
There are things about having a 3rd baby that make me very excited. Things like, watching the girls become big sisters and a little brother. They are so good with their new little baby cousins, I can't wait to watch them dote on their own little baby. I'm looking forward to becoming a parent in the "they outnumber you" club. This gets me access to things like people assuming I know what I'm doing because this is the third time I've had a baby. (I still don't...) but at least I will have less and less "advice" since the club is limited to those with 3 or more babies. There aren't as many "experts" on parenting three or more children. I will always have a legitimate excuse if we are late or flat out don't want to come to events. The work required to get three children dressed, out the door, loaded in the packed vehicle, and be presentable out in public is something that people understand when I say I just don't want to do it! Not to mention another little baby to snuggle! I'm just so excited for the tiny little guy!
Don't be fooled... there is another side to that coin. Anxiety about how a 3rd baby will change the life we finally seem to have somewhat a routine figure out for. The modern society we live in is supportive of families with 2 or less children. Don't believe me...look around a bit. Vehicles are made to hold two car seats. Laws keep getting changed to require longer car seat stays, bigger, more protective car seats, and vehicles are hard to come by that support three within parent reach in order to buckle them safely in. Shopping carts are made for two kiddos at the most. Some stores like Walmart and Dillon's have "kid" carts that help contain toddlers, but have you seen many that can accommodate three? Nope. Restaurants mostly seat for four. Prizes for "families" to win anything is for families of 4. Daycare costs and babysitting options become more than our mortgage.
Not to mention the added person around the house will add diapers, laundry, dishes, and more toys to the already piling up loads of things needing to be done. Kids are starting to get to the age to get some help out of them, but it has to be supervised help. Otherwise we we end up with fighting, playing, and new messes when told to go "clean up your room."
We are doing what we can to prepare for this transition. Jackie has been working on buckling herself into her car seat so she can be moved to the very back seat, where we won't be able to reach and help her. We have already greatly reduced the amount of time we go out to eat and the locations that we are willing to take our kids. Longer than a 15 minute wait...nope. Money saved away for added daycare costs and thankful for only a few months of 3 kids needing daycare before Jackie will head off to Kindergarten. Daily work on completing "jobs" of picking up toys and clothes are improving their "picking up" skills.
Planning for maternity leave still sucks. This is the third time I will leave my classroom of 120 7th and 8th graders in someone else's hands and it doesn't get any easier. There are very few times I wish I had a different job than teaching, but maternity leave is definitely one of them. Trying to plan for lessons that will be taken over by another person, all the details that need to be explained, room organized, on top of the current things that need to be done in the classroom on a daily basis weigh heavy on a teachers mind, and heart. I find myself wanting to make things as easy on me as possible and just purchase until plans from Teacher Pay Teacher sites, but then I feel guilty about the quality of lessons. Oh to have a job that I could just leave for 8 weeks and not stress over. While I love the initiative of those pushing for paid maternity leave up to a year...there is no way I could successfully do that without losing my mind to the stress of planning.
The baby room. We have gone back and forth time and time again on how much "decorating" to do with a "boy" room. The practical side of me knows that non of it matters. We have the important things, crib, rocker, changing table, diapers, wipes, blankets...and so on. Just the thought of the extra work required to paint the walls, purchase bedding, and give the room a proper "theme" makes me tired, let alone actually doing any of it. We made a conscious effort to purchase gender neutral big baby items in order to avoid having to replace things. BUT...it's fun looking at boy stuff. We have decided (at least at this point) a simple red and blue sports room by using items we already have, hand-me-downs from family, and painting one wall of the room red. We still have to put it all together, but just in case we don't get to it, we have the essentials!
Pregnancy a third time. There are moments when I wonder what we were thinking. We had a good thing going with the two girls, I was perfectly happy at pre-kids weight, and I could still drink wine. Those thoughts seem to hit me the 6th time I've rolled out of bed in the middle of the night to pee or when I try to complete a simple task of putting on shoes or picking up laundry off the floor. I keep reminding myself that the pregnancies get more uncomfortable but the births are typically quicker and easier. I find some comfort in that...sometimes.
Flip side of that coin. Being pregnant is really cool. At nights when I lean back in bed and watch him dance around in my tummy, or when the girls can feel him kick and jab away...just make my heart smile. I am convinced that those moments are the ones we remember and miss when not pregnant, causing the desire to want those feelings again. There is a certain adrenaline rush that comes from those swishing movements!
Luckily because we were blessed with two very different babies with the girls, I am very much aware that we will have no idea what to do with this baby when he comes. Yes, we will know how to diaper, feed, and keep him alive, but as far as his likes, dislikes, and personality...we won't have a clue. It'll be "back to parenting 101" for us. And at least this time we know it. We know that we won't know anything about him and have to spend time figuring out what makes him smile, eat, and sleep. I pray for a healthy baby who loves to be poked, prodded, and held by people other than me. I have had the "mommy-clingy" baby with round 2 and I pray for a little "daddy's boy" this time!
Of course all of these are just thoughts that float through my head from time to time. I am unbelievably happy and excited for this little one to come and look forward to seeing what God has in store for him!
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